Resolutions

So...this is it. The big December 31st. Midnight tonight will be it is officially the start of a whole new year. If any of you, like myself, saw the New Years Eve movie then you are probably going out tonight with extremely high expectations. But hey, anything can happen right?

All athletes know that come tomorrow, their lives will be made that much more difficult. Starting tomorrow, all new years resolutionists will crowd the gyms taking all of the machines and making a normal 30 minute session turn into a 2 hour session. Do not get me wrong, I admire and respect everyone who tries to better themselves by getting their body into shape. I have raved about the benefits of exercise and believe everyone should try it.

What confuses me, however, is why tomorrow is of such significance. Yes, it is a new year, but in reality isn't it also just the start of another day? What does tomorrow's significance have to do with us attempting to do things differently? Tomorrow, like yesterday and Wednesday, is just another day in our lives. I guess the point I'm trying to make is why wait for the new year to become a better person?

Many of us will try to be nicer to others, exercise more, do better in school, forgive someone, apologize to someone, give someone a second chance, etc. Tomorrow we will start attempting to accomplish the goals we make for ourselves for the upcoming year. However, instead of viewing each year as a chance to better ourselves, we should focus on each day. Each day presents us with another opportunity to better ourselves. Instead of deciding that next year will be the year you finally begin talking to your mother, or next year will be the year you begin your diet, start today. Start now. Do not wait for each year to pass. Yes, make new years resolutions, but when they are done, make more resolutions.

Each day is an opportunity for us to begin anew. Each day holds the same significance that new years holds.

Make your new years resolutions, complete them, and make more resolutions. Better yourself each and every day.

Fighting

What do we do when we feel as if we are constantly being knocked down? How can we respond positively when each attempt we create only leads to more failure? Where is the end of the road of struggle?


Running has the ability to bring a "feel-good" attitude into peoples lives. Whether we are competing or not, running is scientifically proven to release hormones that make you happier. Add to that the success that all runners face at some point and the sport clearly has a strong impact on the positive mindset of a person. However, few people outside of the sport and, in fact, few inside the sport, can understand the negative mindset running can instill on its participants.

Running is said to be a sport where the more you put in, the more you get out. There comes a point when this statement becomes obsolete. There comes a point when you are constantly knocked down. There comes a point when each attempt at success leads to failure. There comes a point when you wonder whether or not it is worth it all.

Why is this important?

It is another valuable lesson we have the opportunity to learn.

We will face situations in our lives when we wonder whether the fight is even worth it. Maybe it is a student who struggles to get through school. Maybe it is a woman fighting cancer who struggles to get through the day. Maybe it is a drug addict who struggles to stay clean. We all struggle with things throughout our lives and whether or not these things are small or large they are always worth the fight.

We need to continue to fight. Fighting is the reason we live. We live to battle our weaknesses and prove to ourselves that we can come out on top.

Fighting gives us hope. Hope to persevere. Hope to push forward. Hope for the future.

It's only the end of a chapter

Ten years ago I started something in order to be involved and make friends. I joined my middle school track team in 7th grade for the simple reason that my parents forced me to get involved. The fall of that same year I decided that it was time for me to abandon my less than mediocre soccer career to join the Cross-Country team. I joined because I was a weak and thin-skinned 12 year old who liked the warm, loving nature of the cross-country coach more than the emotionless, stoic personality of the soccer coach.

I never would have thought that that decision would have shaped my life immensely.

Flash forward almost 10 years. Tomorrow, I will toe the line for my last collegiate cross-country race.

I have been with this sport for 10 years, almost half my life. To say that tomorrow will be an emotional day for me is a HUGE understatement. It will probably be a day I will remember forever, but not only because of the fact that I stuck with a sport for 10 years.

Tomorrow will be a day to remember because of the blessings running has bestowed upon me.

I found my passion and it has provided me with more smiles then I could have ever imagined.

Find your passion and realize that it will never be perfect, but it will be yours.

Defining

I don't know where we went wrong. I'm sure my 8 teammates who were with me along with my coach are all thinking that same thought. The truth is, none of us know where we went wrong. We felt ready and we felt determined. All of us had the same thoughts going into Saturdays race. We were returning 4 of our top 5 from last years 10th place team and we were coming off a solid performance at the conference meet the week before.

We felt like we were the team.

I guess we weren't.

The truth is, this blog post has been written and deleted numerous times. I just don't know what to write. I want to write, but cannot think of what to write. I don't want to talk about everything working out for a reason or you win some you lose some. I don't even want to talk about how running isn't everything or how you cannot define yourself by one moment. I don't want to write about these things because it would be shallow of me to write about something I did not firmly believe in.

Do I think we are good? Yes, I think we are great, but 10 years from now no one will care about what I think. Ten years from now people will only look back at the results and those results say we weren't good.

There are many different variables that go into racing. Variables that to the outside eye are non-existent. Variables such as the 40 mph winds we ran into or the pancake flat course we ran on. Yet none of these variable matter. We did not show up when we needed to. Do I think we can bounce back? Absolutely. We're too strong to not bounce back, but do I think it stings? Hell yes. This will sting for a very long time. This is be in the back of our minds for a very long time.

This will define us until we prove otherwise.

I guess that's how life works too. You are defined by your failures until you have enough success to prove to people otherwise.

We are allowed to be confused. We are allowed to question why, but above all, we must look ahead and prove to those outsiders that we are capable of much much more.

History

There's a saying that someone is crazy when they try to solve a problem the same way, each time expecting different results. We live in a world where we are suppose to learn from our mistakes. The best way to ensure history does not repeat itself is to learn from the mistakes we've made in the past. I've made plenty of mistakes in the past, we all have. The key is taking the mistakes we have made and turning them into a learning experience.

I ran the most miserable race of my life, on the biggest day of my life. When I toed the line for the NYS Cross-Country championships I did not know what I was going to do. You see the whole season I had trained for one thing: to make states. What I never thought of was what happens once I do that? I had set my goals and accomplished my goals. Therefore, I was toeing the line without any sense of what I was running for anymore. Yes, I wanted to perform well, but I wasn't half as prepared as I was the races leading to that moment.

Flash forward 4 years. After an eerily similar college running career, I find myself in a similar situation. Similar, but not the same. You see I had a goal this whole season and I was blessed enough to have accomplished that goal. This time around however, my goal had two parts. I planned ahead. I assumed that I would accomplish my first goal and focused solely on the second. When my first goal was in jeopardy, I stepped up to the challenge. Now however, there is no more looking back on that goal. I am here. It is now time to step up again. This time it is to take care of the second goal I have set for myself.

In life, we will always be setting goals. However, we fail to think about what happens once they are accomplished. We should always have multiple goals in our lives. We should always be striving for something. One belief I live by is that when a great accomplishment happens, relish in the moment, but then understand that there are many moments to come. When I was younger, I did not understand this concept. I relished in the one accomplishment I had achieved. I neglected to see that there were more accomplishments around the corner. I just needed to be ready.

Then I was not ready.

Now, I am.

Will you be ready?

Streaks

We sat at our MAAC Championship banquet and watched the Iona College Gaels walk up on stage to collect their championship trophy. We also sat there and listened to the MAAC commissioner comment about how it was their 21st consecutive MAAC title. For twenty one straight years they have won the MAAC title. That means that from the year I was born until today Iona has never lost a conference championship. It is a streak that I acknowledge is much more impressive then it is given credit for. However, as impressed by the streak as I am, there is always a common theme among streaks...They have to end.

They have won for 21 straight years, yet I could only sit there and think about the one year they don't win. I have never in my lifetime seen them lose, yet all I could think about was the one moment when they do. People might think I am crazy. I would most likely agree with them. I am crazy, but you have to be crazy in order to believe in what many people might call the impossible. All streaks end. It isn't a crazy concept that I've made up in my head. It is fact and it has numerous real-life examples that back it up.

Why am I writing about this? I'm writing about it because there will always be times in our lives when we feel down. There will always be times when we believe someone we work with, are friends with, or related to, gets everything they want. We will sit there an wonder why not us? We will wonder why, after all the hard work we put in, we are not getting what we deserve.

This streak has taught me one thing. What is going to happen that one day it comes to an end? Will we be too busy complaining that the opportunity passes us by? I've always believed that complacency is the enemy of victory. When you get what you want over and over again, how badly are you going to continue wanting it? How badly are you going to continue working for it? Sooner or later you will get lazy and assume it will just happen. On the other hand, when you are constantly denied something you feel is rightfully yours, that is when you are at your strongest. When you are the ones fighting for what you want, that is when you believe the most.

All streaks have to come to an end, but we need to be ready for the moment they do. We need to persevere and continue to inch forward step by step. It may take 10 years. It may take 20 years, but one day that streak will end and when it does we need to be ready.

Greatness is not a gift. Greatness is achieved.

End of the story

I went to watch a play today with my first grade class. Between telling them to be quiet and listening to them laugh hysterically at the butt of a baboon costume, I didn't really get to watch a lot of the play. However, there were certain parts I did catch and these parts had me thinking about the true message the play was attempting to get across.

The young boy in the story was on a journey to bring back the water supply to the world. He was chosen by some higher power to be the one to bring back the water supply. Throughout the play his journey brings him to collect certain tokens in order to find the heart of the sun. Once he finds the heart of the sun, he learned he needs to dive into this giant tree in order to complete his journey. At first he is hesitant and he asks his community leader what will happen to him. The community leader simply responds that he does not know. That part of the story has not been written yet.

That line really got me thinking. The end of our stories have not been written. We do not know what will happen tomorrow, or next week, or next year. However, one aspect the play touched upon was the fact that the young boy had a choice as to the direction the rest of his story would go. We are all faced with decisions and I think often times we neglect to see the importance of some of these decision. By making these decisions we are writing the next chapter in our lives.

I've been struggling lately with a certain chapter in my story. To be honest, I kept concerning myself with how other peoples stories were going. I forgot that regardless of how their stories go, I have the power to control mine. Just like the little boy in the fable I have a choice.

We all have a choice. We all have the power to shape our own stories. Sometimes we just don't realize it

Anger

Anger never solved anything. Anger never made you feel better. Anger never made you successful.

Many people could disagree with these statements. There are many people out there who feel anger is a productive. I am not one of those people.

I had one of those moments last night where a simple conversation profoundly effects the way you view yourself and your life. I had this conversation with someone who has known me for a while now and had the urge to tell me his philosophy on life. He simply sat down and told me "anger does not get you anywhere." He was 100 % accurate.

We all get angry. Whether we want to or not, it happens. It usually raises our heartbeat, increased our blood pressure and stresses us out even more. When we act impulsively based on anger, the end result usually isn't what we had hoped. Anger destroys friendships, ruins families, and makes enemies. It is an emotion that can destroy us, as I noticed it was destroying me.

I get angry over things I cannot control in my life. I get angry over people who are late, people who slack off, people who complain, people who brag, etc. Not only do I get angry, but I let these people impact my life by bothering me beyond all ends. I suddenly realized after the conversation I had last night that I cannot control how people act. If someone wants to be late, then they will be late. If someone wants to slack off, then they will slack off. If someone wants to complain, then they will complain. It is life. It isn't fair. People will always do things we do not understand, do not agree with, and do not enjoy. It is life and in life you can only worry about your own actions. You can only control how you act and how you feel. Why get angry over the actions of other people? One day they will pay for being late, or pay for slacking off, or pay for complaining. Letting the anger for these people impact your day, even if it's for a minute, is a waste of your time. Let it go. You are who you are and they are who they are. You cannot control that.

Anger will never solve a problem.

Best Laid Plans

Sometimes we make a plan. We have a perfect line between where we are and where we want to be. Many times our plan does not go the way we had expected. I will admit I am suffering from a plan that isn't exactly going the way I had envisioned it. However, I realized after some heavy thinking that maybe my plan isn't as far off the path as I had imagined.

I'd prefer to keep the actual plan to myself, but I will tell you that from the start it didn't go the way I expected. I had, in my opinion, done all that I had needed to do in order for the plan to go smoothly, but right from the start it was out of whack. However, regardless of where my path is going I can still see the goal at the end of the tunnel. I always just assumed that my plan was the best plan in order to help me accomplish what I need to accomplish. I suddenly realize that maybe there were other paths I could take that could all end with the same result. Maybe I had missed an extra variable along the way. Maybe my plan wasn't the right plan.


We all set plans and we all realize that they often do not go according to plan. Yet what if they are going according to plan. What if the path we're on, though it might not be the path we expected, is actually the right path for what we hope to accomplish. Often times we forget that there is more then one way to get to a destination. We'd all like to take the fastest route, but we forget that sometimes the back roads can be more scenic, more beautiful, more of an adventure.

There are multiple ways to get to your goals. Trust the path you're on.

The cornerstone

I sat in church this morning and heard a statement. The stone that the builders rejected became the cornerstone. It was used as my words of advice today and I don't think many people understood why. You see, I couldn't help think about how many times people have been rejected in their lives. I'm not talking about being rejected from a date or a job (although that could work I guess). I'm talking about the number of times people have failed, have been told they don't belong, or have been told they couldn't do something. We are the stone that can sometimes be rejected, but we are also the cornerstone in so many ways.

I began thinking on my run today about learning to ride my bike. I saw a father pushing his daughter and it made me think about this statement as well. How many times did I fall off the bike before I actually learned to ride? I'm willing to guess a lot. Then I began to think about learning how to walk. How many times did I fall? Plenty of times. Yet you see, I never gave up. If I had given up I wouldn't know how to ride a bike, or even how to walk. Suddenly failing seemed so simple. Suddenly I realized how many times we've all gotten back up after falling.

I think in the end I learned that we are stronger then we give ourselves credit for. I failed this weekend. Flat out failed. I also let that failure eat away at me for the past two days. It took some enlightenment today to finally realize that I've failed many times before in my life and I will fail many more times. In truth, we all will. Yet I've also overcome those failures many many times. I've overcome them so much that to this day I cannot remember how long it took me to overcome then. I just have the evidence that I did. We all have the evidence that we did.

Just because we are rejected doesn't mean we can't become the cornerstone. Our failures do not and should not define us. We have evidence of our successes all around us. If we overcame failure then, we can overcome it again.

We are stronger then we think.

Like a feather

I have another confession to make. I kind of like to plan too much. I've known for as long as I can remember that I am a planner. I will always be a planner. Planning things out simply makes me stay sane and allows me to accomplish whatever it is I need to accomplish. It is a trait that I know will lead me to success as a teacher and has led me to success as a student. However, there comes a point when planning can be taken too far.

I enjoy planning things that shouldn't be planned. I'm not talking about writing out planned meals for a whole week, or even planning someone's life. I'm taking about planning my life when I don't even know certain aspects of it yet. Ultimately in the end, when things do not go the way I absurdly planned them too, I get disappointed and begin to formulate a new plan.

This summer I learned how to tone down on the planning a bit a become a little more spontaneous. Little did I know the small spontaneous things I did ended up teaching me a valuable lesson about planning my future; DON'T DO IT.

A good friend of mine, Mark Valentino (who has an awesome new blog), recently wrote a blog post on destiny and he compared it to a feather blowing in the wind. I thought the comparison was genius. I've always tried to plan so many things out that I often times missed simply "going with the wind". I know from personal experience that sometimes life can surprise you. Sometimes you may think a relationship is over, but years down the line you eventually meet again. You may believe that job that didn't hire you was your dream job, but you quickly discover something even better. You simply never know where life is going to bring you. This is not something to fear, it is something to embrace.

Let your life float around like a feather in the wind. You never know where it might land.

Never look back

I'm faced with a series of thoughts recently that has me reminding myself of one of my philosophies in life. Ever since my sophmore year I've taught myself to push the phrase "what if" out of my head. What if this had never happened? What if I had done this instead? "What if" can drive people crazy, espeically if you think about how many decisions in life you have made. I have always felt that everything happens for a reason, so wondering what if is counterproductive to my whole belief.

Lately, being my senior year and all, I find myself questioning what if a lot. To be completly honest, it all has to do with my running. I find myself wondering what if I didn't train enough this summer. I find myself wondering what if I trained TOO much this summer. I find myself wondering what if things do not go the way I am hoping they will.

Then I had a conversation with someone close to me last night and I began to listen to the way I was explaining things. While talking to this person I realized I don't wonder what if for any of these situations. Deep down I actually know the answer to all the what if questions. Deep down I'm 100% confident in my path thus far. So why on the surface am i questioning myself?

We all wonder about the what if's in our own lives. What if I hadn't broken up with her? What if I hadn't failed that class? What if I hadn't gotten that job? It is virtually inevitable not to think about the what if's, but we cannot let them inpact our future desicisons. We need to learn from the past. It is the only way we can successfully move forward, but we also have to realize we can't continue to look back. We need to learn from the past and move on. When we think of the what if's, it is like we are preventing ourselves from succeeding. We can never win if we constantly wonder if we've made the right choice.

I made a promise to myself so stop wondering and stop looking back. This is the only way I can reach my full potential. I need all pistons firing in the forward direction. We all do. If we constantly wonder or worry about the past, we can never treasure and enjoy the future.

Never look back, only hope for the future.

Simply the best

The wrote this post three times today. Each time I deleted it once it was done because I didn't feel I had written a good enough post. However, similar to most days, running has left me with a clear idea on the topic I wanted to discuss. I am going back to Marist tomorrow for my last preseason. This moment is a little bitter sweet because I know once things start, they will not slow down. My senior year will be amazing because I will make sure it is, but I will always have in the back of my mind the looming future. However, that future is a little less scary thanks to some very inspirational people.

I call Marist my second home. It's easy to say that because I love it and I spend a majority of my time there. However, it will always remain my second home because my first home is right here. You see, I've always been a believer in the fact that one day I might need to be willing to give up what I love for the person that I love. I've always felt that love is stronger then anything else and that once you find it, you need to hold onto it. Even if that means changing some of your life plans to be with that person. There have been two people in my life who have lived this philosophy to the end; my mother and my father.

I think I realized today, as my mom began crying while we ate lunch together, the sacrifices my parents have made only to watch me grow up and eventually leave. They have been there through my ups and downs, never once leaving my side. The same can be said for my brother, who has put up with me for 21 years. These three people will never bail on me when times get tough.

Two other people who have done the same are my two best friends from home. We have managed to go to three seperate colleges, live three different schedules, yet still find time to work on our friendship. They have been by my side for as long as I can remember.

The reason I'm bringing these people up is because reflecting back on my 3 years of college, they have been the staples in my life. I've learned this summer that some people are going to come into your life and leave your life, even if you thought they might stick around. However, we cannot dwell on these people because when we do, we lose sight of the important people in our lives. The ones who really matter.

There have been many people in my life who have made impacts as well, but I think these five people deserve a proper thanks. They are simply the best and I know my life after college will be manageable because they will always be by my side.

Chasing Your Dreams

I recently told a friend of mine that I wasn't sure what my next blog post would be about. Little did I know I would get my inspiration from Darren Sharper's hall of fame speech. Sharper stood in front of an audience and began talking about accomplishing his goals. Although I cannot quote him exactly, he told the audience that there is a reason people say they are chasing after their goals. No one says I'm walking after, or crawling after their goals.

You chase after your goals.

It might sound obvious to many people, but for me it spoke volumes. I've always been someone with lofty, but realistic goals. In my running career this has probably helped me and hurt me. I've set the bar high and accomplished what I wanted, only making me realize how hard work pays off. However, I've also set the bar too high and many a times come up short, only feeling let down and unaccomplished. Yet this summer, being a summer where a major goal of mine is within reach, I have found the phrase chasing after my goal to be very literal. All summer I have been chasing after my goal. In fact, I've been chasing after this goal for as long as I can remeber. Yes, I did lose my way a few times along the path to it, but in the end I am here and it is within reach. When I made this goal, it was too high. Yet today, it no longer is. Have I accomplished it yet? No and I may not, but I've tried. I put in the work and I'm anxious to see where I will end up.

That's life. We may never accomplish all we set out to in life. However, if we never try, and we never fail, we can never succeed. If we never set the bar too high, we may never know just how much we actually can accomplish. Yes, we will be let down. Yes, we will feel unaccomplished, but one day we just might actually get there. Even if we never do, we still will land amonst the top.

You can't walk after your dreams. You need to chase them

Quitters Never Win

Quitters never win. That statement was always just part of a saying to me. It never carried much weight and I'm begining to believe it is because I never truely understood it. I never understood it until quitting was staring in the mirror back at me.

I have a confession to make. It's a confession I don't actually think I've mentioned to anyone.

I almost quit running.

I know, big shocker right. I'm not talking about quitting back when I was a child and thought it was too hard. I'm talking about recently. Very recently. Within the past year. In fact a majority of the days throughout my sophomore year quitting was an idea that always came up. Why you ask? Well, to be honest, life wasn't going the way I wanted it to. I had suffered 3 stress fractures within the year that caused me to miss a majority of my Cross-Country season and all of my winter track and spring track season. Every time I had attempted to run again, another stress fracture popped up. I was tired of getting let down and I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I felt I was done.

But quitters never win. I don't know what kept me from quitting, but I'd like to chalk it up to passion. In the end I knew my life without running wouldn't be better then my "broken" (no pun intended Luke) running life was.

Now on to another confession....it was the greatest decision I have possibly ever made. You see, it doesn't matter whether your an athlete, singer, dancer, painter, or anyone. If you love something, you don't let it go. No, your life won't be perfect all the time, but life is all about fighting through the bad times to get to the good times. Every journey has it bumps along the way. That is what makes it all work it. Trust me, I'm in the happy times now. Things find a way to work out.

You'll win in the end. Don't give up

The Power of One

I caved....I started a blog. Why haven't I ever blogged before? Well that's a real simple question to answer. I always figured no one would want to hear me talk (or type for that matter) about random topics. You see, for a long time (21 full years to be exact) I figured there was no use spreading your knowledge unless you had a large enough audience. It wasn't that I didn't want to share my thoughts. It was that I always wanted to share my thoughts in front of packed out rooms. I came to the realization one day that none of that matters. I came to the realization that whether I was impacting one person's life, or 50,000 people's lives, the results were the same.

This brings me to the title of my blog. "One at a Time" was not a preplanned name I've been thinking of for years. It was a name I created literally minutes ago. I chose it because of it's significance in every aspect of life.

The first aspect is what we were just talking about, impacting peoples lives. Influence comes one at a time. It does not matter whether 5 people read my blog. That's 5 more people than I had yesterday. Influence starts with one person at a time.

The second aspect, for me, comes with running. Yes, I'm sorry, I had to include running in my blog. Running, however, is very similar to life. I run one step at a time, one mile at a time, one day at a time. If I take care of each step, then the puzzle begins to fit together. The same can be said for life. We live one day at a time. It is all we can do. Each day is different than the one before it and after it. If you take care of each day the weeks and months will fall into place. It's a simple lesson I learned recently. It has been a great help to me, as I hope it will be a great help to you.

Simply take things one at a time